Monday, January 19, 2009

Caffeine & Matthew 27.52-53

"The tombs broke open and the bodies of many holy people who had died were raised to life. They came out of the tombs, and after Jesus' resurrection they went into the holy city and appeared to many people." (Matthew 27.52-53)

People with a higher caffeine intake, from sources such as coffee, tea and caffeinated energy drinks, are more likely to report hallucinatory experiences such as hearing voices and seeing things that are not there, according to the Durham University study.

‘High caffeine users’ – those who consumed more than the equivalent of seven cups of instant coffee a day - were three times more likely to have heard a person’s voice when there was no one there compared with ‘low caffeine users’ who consumed less than the equivalent of one cup of instant coffee a day.

4 Perspectives on Matthew 27.52-53 in face of this recent caffeine studies:

1) The author or source of that particular passage had too much coffee in the morning.

2) Jerusalem had a coca-cola competition on the previous night. The one who drinks most coke will received a free empty tomb as burial site for hes/her family. Oh.. that comes along with free ossuaries too.

3) There was a purification ritual of drinking 7 cups of coffee among 2nd temple Jews which we still haven't found the historical evidents for it yet. But the fact that number 7 being a perfect or complete number among them serves as a strong clue.

4) Ignore the caffeine research. The passage describes exactly what happened. Risen dead people went into Jerusalem and remain alive till now.

So, what's your perspective?


Rubati Rabbit said...

5) And God the Father rejoiced to see His son well again and decided to celebrate with all His angels. In honour of His Son's work, the Lord decided to turn all the clouds into wine and certain of the angels got very drunk. And Lo, some of His angels who were responsible for maintaining the law of thermodynamics, in a rather drunken state, was curious to see the effects of reversing the Law of Entropy. And as the angel turned the levers and reversed the Law of Entropy pertaining to certain decomposing cells and particles, Lo, they reassembled themselves and arrived back at homoestatis equilirium and was an living, functioning organism once more! 'Hic! I don't think the Lord will be very pleased... Hic!' declared the angel sheepishly. And to which another angel, slurred back, 'Nonsense, how can we be sober when Bridegroom is now amongst the living? The days will come when Bridegroom shall be taken from the Earth then shall we fast. For now, let's celebrate!'

And so the angels let these new entropy defying organism continue to roam about, until the Lord noticed and swiftly contained the damage by assuming them into heaven.

Sze Zeng said...

hahahahaha, a very imaginative one!