Wednesday, May 16, 2007

Endeavor To Study

The past 3 weeks i have been rushing for my application into Singapore Bible College. I'd secured a place with Trinity Theological College, but cancelled it because of some personal reasons. I 'd submitted my application minus a completed medical report and birth certificate. So i did my medical report and asked my family to send my birth cert over to me last week. A few days later I was told that there are traced of blood in my urine...

I didn't know how to respond when i heard that. There wasn't any anxiety nor negative thoughts and emotions. I felt that that's life. Somehow i've prepared myself for it subconsciously. I dont know, really. But given such reaction, there must be some reasons that i'm not conscious of.

Anyway, i was told to go through another more thorough check-up, which i did, on Saturday. I went through it reactionless.

I got hold of the result this afternoon. Everything is fine. There is no red-blood cell in my urine. After submitting everything to SBC, i went away happy and satisfied. Felt like as though i have finished some kind of task. Just a few minutes later, the registrar office called me and told me that my application is being rejected because the lecturer who is supposed to review my application is not around and my application was way passed the deadline. Again, i was reactionless. I told the caller, "OK, thank you". Somehow it seems like i was prepared for such news.

Half a minute later, i called up the registrar office to ask for an email indicating that my application is rejected, so that i have a copy to send to Rev. Burke, my senior pastor.

Dont know whether is it due to my Calvinism. I didn't feel bad. Part of me actually rejoice over this rejection while other part felt like crying. But the crying mechanism just didn't work. No tears.

"The sovereign God is over looking this entire process", whispered the Calvin in me.

Anyway, i had just send my appeal to the dean of SBC. If Calvin is right, whether my appeal is approved or rejected later, all things work for the good of those of love God. Opps.. i mean Paul.

Updates (17 May 2007): On hindsight, i feel disappointed. Anyway, Dr. Chong, dean of SBC, informed me that my appeal is not possible due to immigration regulation. Very kind of him.


jonah said...

It wasn't all bad news,it's only a beginning...a faith experience.let go and let God,you're the promised one!

Sze Zeng said...

Hi Jonah,

I dont know... seems like time is passing fast on this earth. If i dont get my degrees quick, it would be kind of late for more great works.

Thanks for your words.

Anonymous said...

is that y u want to go to get have 'great' works?

If thats so... i sincerely fear for you.
May the Lord have mercy.

Sze Zeng said...

Hi anonymous,

Perhaps, the term 'great works' misleading.

How about 'get degrees so that i can work better for God's works which are great'.

yen nie said...

Hey Sze Zeng,
"If i dont get my degrees quick, it would be kind of late for more great works".- so, is this the not-so- Calvin side from you?


Perhaps the soil is more fertile in Malaysia...

Best wishes!

Sze Zeng said...

You are right Yennie!

That's not Calvin of me.. That's my st.Paul's side.

" out your own salvation with fear and trembling, 13 for it is God who works in you, both to will and to work for his good pleasure.." Phil 2.12-13.

Actually the most fertile is Oxford and Cambridge.


enn@j said...

hey there

Sorry to hear about that
truly understood what u r going thru :)

keep the faith and continue the journey soldier! Time belongs to Him who is timeless, so echoing the OT hero who said "God will provide"

Sze Zeng said...

Thank you Joanne.


BobGriffin said...

Hi Sze Zeng,

You may occasionally see my posts ( at the Yahoo Bible Studies group.

While I have a bachelor's degree, I have no advanced degrees (in spite of 3 years of seminary). I haven't used any of my studies in my jobs, but they are always with me when I speak with people, or when I write.
Do not think that God requires a degree of you. Perhaps the job to which you are called requires some degree, but God has no such requirements of those of us who serve Him. A degree can be useful, even in finding jobs unrelated to the subjects studied, but for the servant of God, it is the knowledge gained which is generally more useful.

Note: there is one member of the Yahoo Ancient Near Eastern group offering on-line classes on Egyptian. Also, someone posted a link to an on-line Coptic grammar. Your participation in the Bible-Studies yahoo group exposes you to many of the current debates in the study of the Bible, and any reading you do in following that will deepen and broaden you.

Take heart, you are in God's hands. Whatever issues are involved with the timing of your education, whatever frustrations come your way, you remain in God's hands. If God wills that the door to formal education be closed, that will become obvious. If God wills that you receive more formal education, the door will be clearly opened.

Be Well,
Bob Griffin