My endeavor continues...
Today SBC registrar's officer told me that they will refund my application fee and documents. That means my appeal is futile. The deadline is just too far behind. Sad..
I'll be meeting up with a friend tomorrow for advice. Since he is in the field for some time, he will be able to give me some good words. I will talk to David Burke later tomorrow. There are TCA, SBC and TTC here in Singapore. I dont know which option should i take..
I dont want to wait for another year... it's dreadful...
I dont want to study fundamentalists' stuffs... it's even more dreadful!
I'm thinking of going to TTC for good.. at least till my M.Th.
I'll call up a few friends for consultation. But at the end of the day, i know that the decision has to be mine. I'll take full responsibility of my own choice and my own path. There is a life to live.
Thoughts of giving up this endeavor occur not-so-many times, due to the rocky road. And as a Christian, when the road is not smooth, it could means different things:
1) Devil is interrupting what God wants me to do.. (on the other side of the coin, could be God testing me)
2) This is not what God wants me to do.. (These are how theological languages work.. at many times, they work both (if not many) ways..)
Very very likely i wont be giving up on this endeavor so easily. This is not merely a calling but what i really want to do. Just as an artist desires to realize his vision for his own life, I have my vision to make real. It's at such crossroad when almost immediately one feels abandoned. No compass, no map, nothing. No matter which road that i choose, it will be my choice.
(I'm not in any mood to argue with hyper-calvinists if there are too many 'i, my, me' stand out in this post)